WHAT IS BDE AND IS IT HARMFUL?
BIG DICK ENERGY
BDE stands for Big Dick Energy. The internet can’t decide if it is referring to the well-endowed or if it is a genderless term, meaning exuding confidence that women can also possess. When I first heard the term used, I thought that Kanye’s “I Got A Big Ego” song had finally been remixed or that BDE was a new staple as a porno category. However, the origins of this term are due to the 5-foot pop sensation Ariana Grande (no pun intended).
Ariana Grande in a since-then deleted Tweet mentioned her current partner’s penis size which spun the remark of Pete Davidson having big dick energy from one of Grande’s followers. BDE will go down as the most memorable event of the year or at least for the month of July.
WHO HAS BDE?
So who has “Big Dick Energy?” Well, the internet will convince you of celebrities such as Rihanna, Cardi B, and Beyonce having this male-ego-driven energy. It is now going beyond the male gender to empower women. However, some people aren’t really into this super-emasculating term.
New York-born author and poet, Charlotte Seley says, “Big dick energy is a misnomer — it is a heteronormative idea that speaks to fantasy men have that doesn’t even add up to women’s expectations of their genitals. Women don’t necessarily want a big dick.” She continues, “If they are into people who have penises, they want one that fits right and feels good.”
Times are definitely changing though. Big Dick Energy used to be considered driving the latest and greatest convertible with whispers of overcompensation. BDE was having the Charizard Pokemon card back in grade school. Big Dick Energy was being considered a playboy jock.
Now Big Dick Energy means, “fuck you pay me” (equality for gender pay gaps). It means “bitch better have my money.” BDE means commanding the front cover of magazines as women of color.
Rachel Hoisie for the Independent writes, “BDE is something you either have, or you don’t. It’s a quiet assurance that in some starts from birth and in others develops over time. But the crucial factor is it’s low-key.” She is perfectly right. It is always in a person’s best interest to be confident. Confidence is key and should never be confused with cockiness or arrogance, but just the aura you give off.
BDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
This type of behavior could be harmful in the relationship. It can also be beneficial. For example, if you, as a man, feel comfortable bending gender normative roles in your relationship to better yourself and your partner, this is big dick energy. However, if you, as a man, feel the need to reinforce gender stereotypes in your relationship, this is Big Dick Energy to most, but could prove detrimental to your relationship with your significant other.
While I focused on the men in the relationship in my aforementioned example, here lies the problem. What about people who do not conform to gender roles? What about women who are not heterosexual? As Charlotte put it in our conversation, “I wonder why it has to be that way and instead nod to something that gives all genders, binary and non-binary, a way to say ‘you’ve got it without flaunting it.”
Would men feel comfortable stating they have Pussy Power Privilege? Nice Boob Aura? It is time to move the conversation beyond physical attributes and focus more on what really matters like how we treat other people. It is time to live better and be better.
http://credit-n.ru/zaymyi-next.html
http://credit-n.ru/zaymyi-next.html
http://credit-n.ru/zaymyi-next.html
http://credit-n.ru/zaymyi-next.html
