THERE IS SUCH THING AS A QUARTER-LIFE CRISIS

#thisis30

If you’re not 30-years-old yet, then the title of this article may sound like a horror movie.  Not to worry, turning 30 actually fits more appropriately within the genre of self-discovery films.  Reaching the age of 30 usually becomes a time for self-reflection where you may contemplate the decisions you have made up until this point in your life.  

Are you where you imagined yourself at 30?  More often than not, you’re nowhere near where you envisioned you would be at this age.  There’s still time to grow and (re)discover who you are, the kind of person you want to be and the type of life you’d like to live.  Many of my friends made significant life changes when they turned 30. They quit their jobs, went back to school to pursue new careers, got married and decided it was time to have their first baby.  It’s an uneasy feeling when your friends are each at very different stages in their lives but are all the same age. Is 30 the new mid-life crisis for New Yorkers?

In taking the time to self-reflect you may wonder whether you can see yourself pursuing your current career path for the rest of your life, whether the person you are with is the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life, or whether you even want to stay in New York for the long-term.  These are all important considerations that we don’t necessarily dwell on during our 20s. What is it about turning 30 that makes us so introspective? “Part of the challenge of this time comes from the fact that your life has actually settled. For many of us, the 20’s were filled with tremendous changes – going off to college or some higher ed, deciding on some major or career path, venturing forth. If not doing more schooling, moving into jobs which may or may not become a possible career.” 

If you already turned 30, then it helps to take solace in knowing you’re not alone when you questioned what you were doing with your life.  If you’re about to turn 30 within the next couple years, here’s some advice from a few friends living in New York City that recently turned 30 and made it out alive:

“Reject all pressure to conform to societal norms.  Don’t feel that turning 30 means you need to start doing what your friends and family are pressuring you to do.”

“You’re not dead; have the best year ever and drinking hurts just a little bit more the next day than usual.”

“All the pressure of getting married and having kids. I personally try to live in a way where I will get to these things when I’m ready. There is no pressure.”

“If you don’t start going to the gym and getting healthy before your 30 I’m not sure you ever will. That’s why I started working out and eating healthy.”

“As you get older, life gets easier.”

“I hope you’re doing something every day that makes you happy. Something that fulfills you, whether your 9-5 or morning meditation or evening walks with your dog. This is it, you’re never going to be younger or more ready to do what you want then you are today.”

There you have it!  Remember you’re not alone when 30 is approaching.  It’s not easy but you have an entire community of (sort of) adults who went through the same thing you’re going through and they’re doing better than ok.