It’s Not You: The Real Reason Adult Friendship Is So Hard and 3 Ways to Make It Easier

Featuring Mel Robbins’ Podcast Episode 283
A +wellvyl Perspective on Social Wellness

If you’ve ever wondered why maintaining friendships as an adult feels like climbing a hill in dress shoes… you’re not alone.

And according to Mel Robbins’ podcast episode — It’s Not You: The Real Reason Adult Friendship Is So Hard & 3 Ways to Make It Easier — there’s actually nothing “wrong” with you.

Modern adulthood just isn’t built for connection.

But that doesn’t mean we can’t rebuild it.

This is exactly why we’re featuring this podcast at +wellvyl:

Because friendship is one of the most important — and most neglected — pillars of social wellness.

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Why Adult Friendships Break Down (And It’s Not Personal)

Mel breaks down a simple truth:

Adult life squeezes out the time, energy, and emotional bandwidth friendships need to survive.

Careers get demanding.
Families need attention.
We move cities.
We grow in different directions.
We get tired.
We retreat.

And slowly, friendships start to fade — not out of conflict, but out of life.

At +wellvyl, we call this the silent erosion of connection.

It’s one of the biggest drivers of the loneliness epidemic.

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Why This Matters for Social Wellness

Friendship isn’t “nice to have.”
It is essential to mental, emotional, and even physical health.

Healthy, reliable connections help us:

• Regulate emotions
• Reduce stress
• Build resilience
• Create meaning
• Feel more grounded and less isolated

But because adult friendship requires intentionality, not proximity, many people simply don’t know how to rebuild it.

This is where Mel’s episode — and +wellvyl’s mission — overlap.

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The Three Friendship Tools That Actually Make a Difference

Mel shares three evidence-backed ways to make adult friendship easier.  And they align perfectly with social wellness principles:

1. Lower the Bar

Small connections count.
Quick check-ins, short calls, casual hangs — these spark real momentum.

2. Be the One Who Reaches Out

Rejection isn’t the enemy — silence is.
Someone needs to go first.
Social wellness thrives on micro-acts of courage.

3. Build Rituals, Not Expectations

Monthly dinners, Sunday walks, a shared hobby — rituals remove the pressure and build connection on autopilot.

These are the kinds of habits that transform friendships from “should” to “sustaining.”

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+wellvyl’s Take: Adult Friendship Is a Social Wellness Issue

We feature this episode because it validates something we see every day:

People are lonely not because they don’t care…
but because we’ve lost the structures that help us show up for one another.

+wellvyl is here to rebuild those structures — through intentional spaces, tools, events, and conversations that make connection easier, safer, and more natural.

Adult friendships don’t have to feel hard.
They just need support.
They need practice.
They need community.

And that’s exactly what social wellness is all about.

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